Motivation, Or Lack Thereof

I went into the office tonight to train my bestie, Sierra, on some office tasks she'll be helping out with during our "cycle."  It was fun!  She picked it up really well.

On the drive home I got to listen to whatever music I wanted, as loud as I wanted, and it made me want to DANCE!  OMG, dance!  I haven't been to a club in over a year!

Then this super cute girl passed me in her cute car, and it hit me: I've stopped caring about my appearance.

Yeah, I put on makeup, but not even close to house I used to.  I usually smother on some foundation, line my eyes with liner and put on some mascara.  5 minutes tops.  This might be more than what some of you wear, but for me, it's practically nothing.  Especially with how naturally ugly I am, or, I suppose you could say, how much natural beauty I don't have. I used to spend 15-20 minutes on my face each morning.

My hair?  I don't do it.  Shower and go.  I used to spend 15-20 minutes styling my hair.

What happened to me?

If your answer is, "You had a baby."  You're right, I had a baby.  But you're wrong, that's not why I no longer put work into my appearance.  It's because I don't go anywhere.  I don't see anyone.  I stay at home day after day. I hang out with Lily all day, and I work in my cold, dark basement all night. I get a little bit of sleep, then the routine repeats.  Why should I put effort in to how I look if no one sees me?

I need a change.  I'm never going to lose this weight if I don't care.  I'm never going to feel pretty again if I don't try.

So tonight, I'm feeling quite motivated to exercise.

Monday. I will work out.  I will lose weight. I will find my confidence again. And I will go to the club soon.  Very soon.  I will dance out my frustrations, I'll get away from my house, my chores, my crying baby, and I'll feel pretty.

Who's with me?