40 Weeks Today!

I took a bath last night to relax.  I was so worked up about wanting this baby to come that I was just frustrated that it wasn't happening fast enough.

As soon as I had my first real contraction, I regretted feeling that way.  I thought to myself, "Can I really do this?"  "I'm crazy for thinking I can go natural." "I'm paralyzed and I can't get up."  "I need to cry it out."

Instead of crying, I turned over, laid on my side and prepared for the next one.  I took a deep breath when I felt it coming on, I counted to take my mind off it, and I took a deep cleansing breath after it.  It wasn't as bad as the first one.

It starts with the tightening and aching I've been feeling the past few days... then it grows stronger and tighter until I feel like something is going to break or pop.  The pain spreads to my hips, thighs and my back.  Just when I think I'm about to explode, the pain slowly fades away, then the tightness goes away.  Then I'm left with no pain.

I think I can do this.  I've had them all night long. Some are worse than others.  They still aren't incredibly regular.  I'm going to wait it out at home as long as possible.  But, since I have a 45 minute drive, that might not be very much longer.

With each contraction last night, I expected my water to break at the peak of each one from all the pressure, but that didn't happen.

At about 3am I woke Lance up to time them.  They were about 30 seconds long and coming 4-5 minutes apart.  But we were both so tired, I decided to try to get as much sleep as possible instead of continuing to time them.  I think I got a decent amount between each one.


I've had three since starting this post.  I have to stop, close my eyes and breathe to get through it.  I'm not sure if I could walk or talk during these, as I haven't tried.  I will soon though.  I'm going to put on some shoes and walk around in my backyard here in a minute.

Hopefully today is Lily's birthday.