I cry a lot. Mostly about how the person who looks back at me in mirror looks. I wasn't prepared to look like this. I look better today than I did on Wednesday, when I first saw my reflection. Wednesday through Saturday last week were the hardest. I didn't want to see myself. I asked Lance to take down all of the mirrors in the house, and he just laughed at me. Then I cried more. I was serious.
I guess I expected to look about how I looked at Sierra's wedding. Just a little soft around the edges. But no. I looked 7 months pregnant, just squishier, flabbier, and more swollen.
The swelling finally went away a couple of days ago, and I look a little better. But my waistline really needs some work. Due to how "torn up" I was, I'm afraid to start exercising until that really heals. It still hurts and stings sometimes, but I've weaned myself off of all the pain meds that they had me on, and only use the witch hazel and numbing spray now. I'm hoping I can ease into Insanity in the next week or so. I'm thinking about just doing the warm up for the few weeks before my 6 week visit. Then, assuming an OK from my doctor, start Insanity for real at that time. Then hopefully I'll go back to looking normal.
I love baby Lily though. She is so sweet. She's a good baby. I only really hear her cry when Grandma changes her diaper. My mom has really cold hands. Lily doesn't really cry when I change her. She loves to be bundled, but likes having her arms free so they can be by her face. Most of the time when she's sleeping, she sleeps on one of her arms. It is very cute!
At her 4 day appointment, the doctor was shocked at her weight. Lily's birth weight was 7lbs 13 oz. After four days it was 7lbs and 10oz. He said most babies aren't that close to their birth weight by then, and that I was "super mom". I guess I was feeding her too much, but it got her jaundice to go away super quick! More feedings = more dirty diapers = less jaundice.
We take most of our pictures with Lance's phone, so I don't really have access to them. But here are some pictures...
I love her.
She is beautiful! Josh had a very strangely shaped head when he first came out too. :)
ReplyDeletePlease try not to worry too much about how you look! It's true, no one really prepares you for that. I felt like I'd been hit by a bus after I had Josh--and looked like it too! A good rule of thumb I've heard is "nine months up, nine months down." Some people get it back faster, but it always takes me closer to a year. Either way, try not to go too hard on yourself. Some of it can be worked off and some of it will just take time (nursing hormones do weird things). I always comfort myself with the fact that everyone is looking at the baby, not me! And by the time you've got your body back you'll probably be ready to do it all over again! ;)