Not in the Mood

I haven't been in the mood to type out my feelings.  I can't put into words how I've felt the past couple of weeks.

Lance's dear mother, Carol, passed away on Thursday, November 15 at about 7:15pm.  It was a long, heartbreaking day.

Tuesday night I skipped out on work to go see her, which I blogged about already.  Wednesday night, Lance went up alone and gave Carol a blessing, a blessing to release her spirit from her frail body.  Thursday morning, Lance was getting ready for work when he got a call from Nicole, his sister.  Carol was making "gargling" or "wheezing" noises. Nicole had already spoken to hospice, and they said that when you are closer to passing away, those are the types of noises you make as you're trying to breathe.

Lance got off the phone, filled me in on the info, and then we embraced each other as we both sobbed.

We spent the entire day up at Nicole's house where Carol had been living.  Carol was in a coma and she slept all day, but we talked to her and we told her we loved her.

Hospice checked in every couple of hours.

The kids (my neices and nephews) had been playing outside all day long, but when the sun went down they all came inside.  It started to get really loud in the small living room space, and Lily was getting overwhelmed.  She was also tired, so I took her upstairs to feed her and put her down for a nap.

Lance came up and told me that his mom was gone.  I did my best to be strong for him.

I'm still in a state of shock.  It has almost been two weeks, and I still can't believe it. 

 Both parents gone.